Emily and I have been on a path for a very, very long time.

We have tried over and over and over to fit into this mold of what we should be doing an how we should be doing it.  Go to college. Get a degree, meet the right people, get the right job, meet the right person. Get married. Buy the right house.  Have the right amount of babies. Live in the right neighborhood. Stay, grow roots. Live the right life.

Here is our real story this year.

2020 was supposed to be the year. The year we bought a house. The year we wanted to start a family. The year that we will start to become comfortable and safe.
Clearly the universe had another plan for us.

Covid happened.  My family turned their back on me. And we started feeling wrong, like we were wrong.  Everything we did to try to be normal or do the responsible thing had back fired.  I have two degrees and ten years in management and I still couldn’t find work that paid over 40k without having to go back into customer service to appease the lives of other people.  Emily has a degree and found her DREAM job.  Emily’s dream job let go of 12k employees yesterday.  Emily was one of the 12k.

We are opening up to our family and our friends about how all of these things have led us to our decision. . .

Thank GOD for 2020!!!

I mean, it has been a blessing!!!! We are finally faced with hard questions about what we want in our lives and how we want to portray our dreams to the world.  This quarantine made us go back to the big dreams you talk about when you are young, the ones that made you fall in love with one another.   There was this moment when I was in Scotland and I was sending Emily all these pictures of old libraries and book stores that you could cozy up in a corner to read your favorite book, and she said the thing that sealed everything for me.  She said, “I want to own a book store with you, I can see us doing just that.”   And let me tell you, my heart almost fell out of my chest with so much love and joy!!
If you are wondering if this post is going to lead you all to discover that we are opening up our own bookstore in the midst of a pandemic, the answer to that is no – but we are branching out in a different way.
In Scotland we happened upon a lot of different people, who lived different lives than what we knew in the United States.  Lives that you could dream about, and they were actually doing it!  One of the couples we met published their own books of poetry and stories about their adventures and a collection of pictures that they took while living their best lives.  I had forgotten about this couple.  Because in what world is this a valid source of income with health insurance and a retirement fund, and a place to build our suburban house with 2.5 kids and the perfect dog.

Then Emily lost her job.
And I asked, “What would you do if there were no limits, no money issues, just you living your best life and loving every moment of it. ”
Her response, “I want to travel the world with you and take pictures so you can write about it.”

Remember the Scotland moment about how my heart fell out?
I am pretty sure that my heart stopped beating in this moment.  I had found someone who let me dream as big as I could dream, and then found a way to make my big dreams a reality for both of us to live in.

We aren’t perfect. We are crazy in love with each other. We are crazy in love with our dreams.
We are also unhappy, with our careers – or lack there of – with our future, our present.  We have placed a lot of guilt and blame on ourselves because of it.  It has been a battle.  From the beginning we always said we would make this life a dream come true – and we are finally trying to do that.

SO!
Here is your big announcement! We are finally ready to tell everyone that we have decided for the next 6 months, we are going to travel.  We are buying a camper and taking the whole Grimmans clan with us – the dogs and the cats.
We have a lot to work with, our pups are high maintenance – one with cushings and the other with thyroid and pancreatitis.  The cats are going to be the real challenge though, making sure they get enough exercise and love while on the road.  Our main objective is to travel to parts of the country that we haven’t seen, head up to the east side, and even Canada.
The point is, in six months we can do things we have never done, we can be people we have only dreamed of becoming, and we can fulfill ourselves.  In six months we won’t be losing out on security and the safety net, because we don’t have that now.  We have absolutely nothing to lose and the world to gain.
We are driven and TERRIFIED.
That is the most justified statement, we are scared to take the leap, we are scared of what will happen to us along the way and after the six months.

The world is different, the future is uncertain.  Everything that we once counted on has been ripped away from us and that is where we are.   So now it is our chance to live for ourselves and do what we believe is the right thing to do for our family and for ourselves.
Emily and I are incredibly happy with one another in our love, but we also strive to love ourselves and find happiness in our own souls as we are in our marriage.  What is even  more exciting is finding out what this experience will bring to our marriage and growth!

Happy Sunday, Dears!